Last month I had this amazing opportunity to go to the Miss Rodeo Oregon Question and Answer session that they had set up sometime last week. I was a little apprehensive about going; it makes everything get really real, real fast (if that makes any sense). I think the most concerning thing for me was to see which of my horse friends was going to be trying out against me.
For those of you who don’t know, I stopped showing equitation and pleasure not because I didn’t like it but because I hated the “show girl” status that went with it. The attitudes, the negative demeanors, and the sabotage was too much for me. I can handle competition but I can’t handle the disgust I felt towards myself for associating myself with that riff raff. Now I’m not saying that all people who show are like that, that is a very juvenile comment for me to make. As I grew older I came to understand that it was all about the people that you associate yourself with and that everyone is different.
I don’t want to try out against my friends. I wouldn’t mind it so much if there was like 20 of us but there won’t be. I hate the thought of just two of us with judges saying, “you are better than so-and-so.” I don’t want to be on either end of that scenario.
I got a little nervous about the politics of everything. I kept chiming in and answering questions and volunteering information. I stopped myself because I was afraid of others thinking that I was stuck up!
I need to get those thoughts out of my head.
I wasn’t born into this rodeo queen world – it’s something that I have voluntarily decided to join.
I think of all the fun that I have though studyig and practicing with my friend Rachel with my accomplished sister Nicole being our professor. These fun shenanigans and the ability to meet and network with new people over social media is why I want to do this!